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StartupBus: We did this! (Afterword)

20 Mar
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Photo by Alex Rodriguez

Writing about the StartupBus is never easy, I’m doing it, because I just realized that I’ll never find the perfect moment… I’ll probably never fully decompress, since I plan on staying on the StartupBus team for an indefinite period of time.

I wish I had one brilliant phrase to summarize what we did and all it meant for me. I’ll guess you’ll have to sit tight and read my ramblings, since this is my very desperate attempt at putting it into words…

The StartupBus is a hazing ritual in its purest form: it pushes participants to their limits and makes them realize that they CAN do tough shit; instantly setting apart “the boys from the men, the girls from the women and the travestis from the transgenders” as Elias put it.

 

ABC… Always Be Conducting

We all keep coming back because for some of us it becomes a drug: life can never be the same after it, it seems dull and uneventful; the thought of never getting a fix again is just too dire to bare. When I hit rock bottom I became a conductor, because the thought of not having other people from Mexico experience what I had experienced, enraged me to the point of losing sleep.

I honestly thought we were going to cancel a week before, because the logistics behind the bus are monstrous, and things were simply not falling into place, it was hands down the most stressful time of my life so far. I was glad to have a good friend to lean on; in the end our visions and priorities turned out to be different, but I could have never pulled this off  without Jeduan. Some entrepreneurs get the push they needed to start doing big things from the bus experience. I got mine mostly from him (message I tried to deliver between screams in a very agitated state during the finals)… he has been my professional partner in crime this far, every big challenge I’ve taken has been discussed with him, and every time I was tempted to jump alone I always asked him to come with. Until now: I finally realized I can do huge projects by myself and that they can be incredibly successful; however, the bus was a team effort, our last Hoorah! our “out with a bang”, through and through.

We also had an amazing production team, some were there only for a section of the process, others stuck by us through the entire thing. All of them made it possible: they fundraised, organized housing, made presentations, called meetings, lifted spirits. They were the beating heart of this operation.

Finally, we had the larger family. Last year Team Mexico was conducted by Eoin, so we never really got to see the amount comradery that engulfs the people that run this. Fraternities emerge from each bus, but conductors and directors are connected at an even deeper level, these are all people I consider friends and brothers in arms, even though most of our relationship has been through email and Twilio: I’d cook for them, host them, take care of their kids, visit them in jail or ask them to dog sit Moush any day of the week.

I’ve been asked to explain what makes The StartupBus different from other events: the level is definitely an important factor, since the quality of participants, organizers and judges is unparalleled; but the intensity is the one that can’t go without mention. Building in three days is no picnic, doing it with so much added pressure and complications breaks a person down… getting it done makes them come out rebuilt as a completely new being. The psychological factor is what sets us apart and what makes this unforgettable, like hiking a high peak, running a marathon or making it to the Olympics, the high comes from the pain endured. The fact that buspreneurs do it with strangers who put up, stand by and eventually carry each other through it, makes them come back as brothers and sisters.

So yeah, we’re a fraternity that hazes every new member, but only because we want to bring out the best in them…

 

And the anecdotes

As I said in the beginning of this post, writing about my StartupBus experience is hard, because the more time elapses; the more great details I pick up on, the more fun anecdotes I remember, the more I miss my bus and friends…

I have  a list that goes on and on of favorite moments, but since I know I have an audience, I’ll only pick three: the highest high was the euphoria we generated BEFORE they announced the finalists, Team Mexico couldn’t stop cheering, screaming and laughing, we had luchador masks on, flags, people flying, and  VERY loud cheering in Spanish, regardless of the fact that we were in Texas in the middle of an American competition. There was a LOT of us (38 to be exact, the biggest group there), so the other teams kept staring, some amused, some bewildered, some wondering if we were drunk… We sorta were, in that moment it hit us all at once; we realized just how cool our team was, how much it meant to be there, and how much fun we were having. We left that room in a conga line (enven though only two of our teams made it through), not even the winners of the entire thing celebrated that hard.

My other favorite moment happened before the previous one, when we got to the San Antonio hotel. I went to buy candy to the Walmart and got to the conductors’ and directors’ meeting late. Apparently this gave everyone else enough time to do intros and chat a little, Ray (the Master’s conductor) introduced himself to Jeduan by saying “Are you Maria?” in the most charming Southern accent, which got the whole room roaring with laughter as Jon (NYC conductor) replied “Are you drunk?… I mean, does he look like a girl to you?”. This gave for plenty of jokes later on, but I digress; during that meeting Elias explained his vision to us, he explained why he keeps making this crazy bus ride happen. He said “I’ve seen this change lives, that’s why I keep coming back”… It would have probably taken me years to see it so clearly and to express it with that much feeling.

My last one was in Austin. Since we had some housing shortage, I fitted 8 people in a room for two in a Traveler’s Lodge in Austin. We got there around 12am, it was the first time we truly got to sleep, so we raffled beds, got settled on floors and sofas and went to sleep almost immediately. At four in the morning I started hearing knocking, I panicked thinking it was the concierge who had finally figured out we had “a couple” of extra guests, so I started blabbering in English. We were surprised to hear one of our room mates replying “Guys, it’s me, could you open up?”. Apparently he sleep walks, he woke up as he heard the door close and thought “Fuck”, he knocked every other hour and slept on the floor by the door in the meantime, other guests passing by the hall stared at him, thinking he was some hobo that had wandered into the hotel with his sleeping bag. We offered him one of the beds when he got back in, “Neh, at least now I’m in the room now”, he replied as he huddled in the floor next to me. We roared with laughter every time we retold this story. I still get random texts with details from it.

I could get motivational and keep going about the times I saw teams and buspreneurs raise above themselves, or about the numerous times I saw them put their and their teams’ pieces back together, but this post would get insanely long. Besides, I will have time to write mora about that once I process and organize my ideas.

 

What life’s about

Right before we went into the finals I followed Eoin’s lead and sent all my buspreneurs an email thanking them for the experience, telling them how amazed they’d left me and how I considered each and everyone of them a friend.

If I had to trace my StartupBus story back to its origins, I’d have to point at a trip I took to the beach with the Sandbox crowd a few years back. I met Elias sitting on the beach, drinking beers, I was there to fundraise for a different startup. He told me about the StartupBus (he had just run the first edition), and I remember retorting “that’s the stupidets thing I’ve ever heard… so is Mexico participating?”. Things fluttered, circled, jumped and evolved from there, with the intersections, comings and goings of many talented people, unfurling in what is today: in this very moment in which I’m working with Elias and appreciating everyday I get to do it, because his vison of “the stupidest idea ever” inspired me like nothing before, to the point of wanting to change my life and do bigger and better things… all because Mexico WAS on that first bus.

Fabian, the founder of Sandbox also founded Holstee, a company that has made its manifesto very famous. He gave me a card with it printed on the last day of that trip. My favorite line reads “Life is about the people we meet and the things we create with them. So go out there and start creating”… Guess what Fabian?, I did just that!

I concluded the email I sent to my team quoting that line and thanking them for creating this with me. Now, I just hope to grasp all of it, to get peace with the parts I wish were different and to truthfully be thankful for all the wonders.

Why 50 Shades of Grey and Twilight women SUCK

11 Jan

First, I have to come clean and admit that I never read past the first few pages of the  Twilight books; I did, however, sit through the entirety of the movies. As for 50 Shades, I made it to the second half of the second book, and then looked up reviews and summaries online. Still, I think my argument is relevant, because I’m criticizing the concept as a whole, not the details of the story or the writing. Women obsessing over those shitty books and movies is like going back in time, to Snow White or Belle…

The above is not a trivial critique, each Disney princess’ characteristics and story respond to the time they surfaced in. For example, Snow White’s prince doesn’t have a name, probably because back then marrying someone was all that mattered… The Little Mermaid gave up her whole world and voice (yes, literally) to be with some guy she had seen twice; Belle was the Beast’s prisoner, as was her dad; who was also gravely mistreated by the same hairy monster (a beast, in the most literal sense) she ended up with. When we take away the sugar coated love stories, a dark picture of tortuous interactions is drawn quite clearly. Those are the images of femininity that an entire generation grew up with.

The first mildly independent princesses were Pocahontas and Mulan. In the end of her story, Pocahontas chose to stay with her father and tribe, after stopping a war and deciding who to love, it was the first film in the history of Disney movies in which the princess decided to stay by herself. For her part, Mulan was strongly pressured by her family to get married, she eventually fought the Huns, saved the emperor, brought honor to her family… and got married, so the contradiction in the message is clear: you can be a badass, but happily ever after means getting married. The argument they made around it was absurd and included Captain Shang kinda crushing on a male soldier, who turned out to be Mulan.

Finally, the first princess with a goal other than marriage in her mind was Tiana from the Princess and the Frog, who wanted to be a chef and own a restaurant. But, let me point out that there’s more than ten years between Tiana and Mulan, so in a decade, we basically went from a badass that fought for her country and brought honor to her family, to a girl that wanted a restaurant. In the end of her movie, Tiana got married and was able to pay for her restaurant with the money she got from kissing the frog in the first place.

The issue here is that Disney Princesses have always been marketed as aspirational characters; which means we basically bombarded an entire generation with frail, shallow and obnoxiously beautiful female idols, whose sole purpose in life was to find “true love” –regardless of all the torment that came with it– and get married in a big and ridiculous ceremony. I wish I could insert Facebook pictures here of my acquaintances’ recent weddings, and then of those who have already signed divorce papers…

The progression of the Disney princesses happened at the same time as female liberation rights fought and won the hardest battles (parity in wages, penalties for battery, abortion… the list goes on), so in some sense it balanced out liberalism with staunch conservative values, marketed in shiny packages and spun out as sick love stories. Since the hype around Disney died down, other female icons have taken their place; that’s exactly why I have an issue with Twilight and 50 Shades of Gray.

Bella, the main female role from Twilight, belongs to a generation where women with strong characters were a common place. The books and movies were read and seen by kids who were familiar with Harry Potter, where Hermione was the smartest witch who went to war against the Dark Lord with her friends and eventually ended up with one of them; and the Hunger Games, where Katniss fought to the death twice to save her family from starvation, brought down tyranny and ended up with the good guy who protected her the entire saga. So we have women who saved entire nations, fought the Dark Lord, were great friends, witty, strong, smart… and Bella crying and getting suicidal for an entire book and movie because she doesn’t have a boyfriend.

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The issue goes deeper: the first time Bella had sex with Edward she woke up filled with bruises, from the sheer brutality of him; and regardless, she went back for seconds. Afterwards, she was impregnated with a baby that started killing her from within, and never considered terminating it; she eventually died giving birth, and was brought back as a vampire. Evidently, Twilight without the great soundtracks, angsty looks and model-like actors is downright morbid story.

As for 50 Shades of Grey (Twilight fan fiction, turned into a bestseller), I’m all for sexual liberation, but I can see women getting hit and, after reading the book, thinking “he’ll change” or “he must’ve had a rough childhood”… That’s one of the central arguments in the saga: Anastasia goes back to Christian AFTER he beat the crap out of her (Rihanna and Chris Brown, anyone?) and the author makes a very compelling argument on how with some patience and cuddling, even a psycho sadomasochist will change.

So yeah, I’m not OK with those books on principle, and I’m sick of how young audiences remain passive not only towards bad writing, and filming; but towards destructive messages. Women no longer need to be put down, authors, directors, producers, movie-goers and readers need to realize that.

The UN, Panama and me

23 Nov

Right now I’m in Panamá City, representing myself, the projects I’m involved with, women and Mexico in the Young Women LATAM and the Caribbean Regional Leadership, Governance and Sustainability Forum organized by the UN. My issue area is tech and entrepreneurship… and it has been quite a challenge. I’ll make sure to make an in-depth evaluation/ critique of what I’ve seen here for TechCrunch, but let’s just say women are missing in tech, but tech is also nowhere to be found in any of the women-led projects I’ve learned about in this event.

I want to use this space to talk about my experience, since it has been very fulfilling intellectually, personally and professionally.

For starters, this is definitely not what I expected from a UN forum, it’s been much more fluid and less protocol-oriented than I thought it would be. I love how much femininity is a part of it, things like sensibility, passion, creativity, sisterhood and friendship are brought up over and over again; and an integral part of how activities flow. Art is also a big part of this; ideation processes are something we do all day, we even have a team of illustrators that make infographics of EVERYTHING we do and a rapper that randomly breaks into song whenever she’s picked up enough material.

We did a dynamic today called the World Café in which we defined agendas looking at Cairo+20 (the UN/ UNDP conference in which they’ll look at the goals established in Cairo 20 years ago regarding gender, sexual and reproductive rights and population). During this dynamic I got to speak to a Peruvian indigenous about technology and education… My mind was blown. It all started with me saying “I think the UN got it wrong…”, which made some in my table shift  uncomfortably, but she looked up brightly and said “I agree”, we were talking about the definition of education, I told them how I think universities are well on their way to disappearing and how education will horizontalize even more, how our children will study many many years, but not necessarily get a degree. As I finished my speech, a girl from Dominican Republic looked at me eagerly and screamed “I had never thought of it that way!”. My table came up with a small diagram in which we suggested rethinking terms and plans, looking at the future from the minorities, government and civil society standpoint, but also considering private industries and entrepreneurs as central actors.

Afterwards we had a guided meditation where we visualized a reunion of this same conference 10 years from today. I saw an older woman, dressed just like the peruvian in my table in my mind, very clearly. I saw her accomplished, as an indigenous entrepreneur and smiled huge. When we opened our eyes we just smirked at each other with quiet complicity. I like to think she imagined the same thing I did.

We had lunch, took pictures, did workshops, activities and listened to conferences. It’s all a bit of a blurr of hard work, excitement, smiles, adventures and exahustion. Afterwards there was a coctail at a museum.

I finished my day with an amazing fish diner, mojitos and karaoke.

I’ll make sure to keep writing even if it’s simple posts like this one on the next two forum days and maybe even on the two after that as well, when my sole mission will be to get lost in beautiful Panama. On that note, I’ve been very active on twitter, in case you wanna stay in the loop, we also have a hashtag going.

I’ll go pass out now. Night!

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